


Periwinkle

by orphan_account



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, First Kiss, First Love, Yule Ball (Harry Potter)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-04
Updated: 2020-09-04
Packaged: 2021-03-07 00:41:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,103
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26288197
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Harry decided not to go to the ball. Apart from not having a suitable partner, his heart woke up crying and moaning about nothing.Luna disagreed. His heart had reasons to lament. Nobody around Harry payed attention to his suffering, and he was too gentle to notice their disregard. She needed to do something.She wasn't invited to the forest with him. But when she saw him sitting there, her chest got warmer and the butterflies in her stomach went loose.She needed to do something.
Relationships: Luna Lovegood & Harry Potter, Luna Lovegood/Harry Potter
Comments: 2
Kudos: 53





	Periwinkle

**Author's Note:**

> It does happen during the Yule Ball, but the context is this: Harry didn't ask anyone to go with him and Luna said no to anyone who approached her.

Harry threw the rock at the tree, trying not to think. Trying not to feel.

It was a funny thing, that; feelings. For most of Harry's life, feelings guided him. The strong love he had from his family and friends made him perseverance when success was impossible; his extreme hatred for those who were immoral gave him strength to face the challenges; his undeniable loyalty to what was right made his fame and glorious disgusting. Without his feelings, he wouldn't have made it that far. A mind concerned with mere rationality would choose his own safety before anyone else's. 

It was an incontestable fact he embraced his emotions, that he was comfortable around them. 

So why did his heart scream out in agony wanting attention? What sort of sadness inside of him he couldn't recognize? 

It couldn't be not going to the ball. He hated being the centre of attention and, as it turned out, that was him everywhere he went. 

It couldn't be not having a partner. It was true he wanted to be with a certain someone, but his shyness made him glad they didn't talk. Above all else, he was relieved.

It couldn't be anything recent, or shallow, as the aching reached far into his soul, giving him the certainty of its depth. 

Then, what was it? After spending his entire life making sure everyone was cared for, who had he missed? 

"Harry," Luna whispered, taking him out of his mind. 

He jumped, startled, gulping as he realized who it was. His certain someone.

She was beautiful, but that wasn't new. Her blonde hair, almost white, reflected against the setting sun and reminded him of her softness. Her dress was impeccable; so overwhelmingly colourful and so utterly hers. Her confidence was object of envy and her identity was set on stone. She had no doubts about who she was and Harry had not doubts about who he wanted her to be. 

But, of course, he wouldn't tell her. 

"Luna," he whispered back, trying not to take her out of her bubble. "What are you doing here?" 

Although they were close to Hogwarts, Harry hated seeing her exposed to danger. 

"Avoiding solitude," she stated, as if he should know what that meant. 

Harry sighed. "Well, I seem to be seeking it." 

She blinked twice. "Does that mean you want me to leave?" she said as though it wasn't offensive. As though she didn't mind. 

"Of course not," he was quick to answer. "You are always an exception."

He avoided her eyes before he could see if she smiled. And she did. 

"Can I sit with you?"

Harry got closer to the border of the log. "Please."

"The forest is sad tonight," she said, once seated. "It's cold. I can feel it."

Harry looked at her bare feet on the ground. "I suppose everything is cold when you're not wearing shoes," he joked. "Have they taken your sneakers again?" 

She stared at him for a bit. "No." 

He thought it was best not to inquire any further. But he wanted to speak with her, so he asked. "Why aren't you at the ball?"

"I've told you, I don't want to be alone." 

"Don't you think the people there would be enough to keep you company?"

"They keep company of who they think I am," she explained, and a hint of sadness bled through her tone. "They don't like knowing me. They speak to Luna, but not to me." Then, she looked at him again. "Does that make sense?" 

How odd. Luna never asked if she made sense. 

Harry thought back to the numerous crowds wanting to speak with the chosen one. "Completely."

"It probably only does for us both," she said then giggled. 

"Yes. That's why it's right." He smiled along. 

A few moments in silence passed, until she broke it. "You are never alone."

"Pardon?" 

"You said you were seeking solitude, and I found it funny. You are never alone." 

Harry pondered. It was true. Due to his role, he was always surrounded by people wanting something from him.

Yet, strangely... "I never feel anything other than loneliness," he answered, and shocked himself. He had that realization just then, but it was so obvious. So strong. 

"I am sure," she responded, resonating with his words. "I can't imagine the weight you carry on your shoulders." 

As a reflex, he lifted them. "I don't, either. I can't think about it, otherwise I would explode." 

Luna touched his shoulder, and he froze. He almost felt her skin on top of his shirt. 

She started comforting him, running her hand on his back, in gentle touches. Harry had an unforeseen urge to cry. 

Nobody ever comforted him. 

"I am sorry about what happened to you, Harry," she whispered again. "About everything." 

He looked her right in her eyes, finding in her gesture the courage to admit. "I wanted to take you to the ball." 

Her touches stopped. 

For a second, Harry regretted saying it. Until she replied. 

"Why didn't you?" 

He gulped. "I was afraid you would reject me." 

She denied with her head. "I kept wishing for you to ask me." 

Harry heart's stopped in place. He moved his feet and hands, trying to find something to say.

He looked back at Hogwarts. The ball was only starting. 

"There is still time," he suggested.

She looked at it as well. "I don't think it fits us very much." 

One corner of his mouth rose. "You're probably right." 

"Besides," for the first time in his life, Harry saw Luna become shy, "I wouldn't handle being near all the others girls while by your side." 

Harry stared at her, digesting her confession. Was Luna insecure around him? 

He despised the thought, using every fibre of his being to reply. "There are no other girls."

Taking advantage of their proximity, he decided not to think. He kissed her. 

It was a childish kiss. Soft, single, quick. But her lips were warm, and his legs gave up midway through. He thanked goodness he was sitting. 

Despite their protests, they had to be separated. But he refused to distance their faces more than necessary. He could still feel her minty breath on his mouth. 

"I am sorry," he started. "I kissed you without knowing you would want it." 

Her eyes shone in surprise. "Everyone knows I would want it." 

Harry almost choked. "What do you mean?" 

"I've liked you ever since I saw you, Harry." She wrapped her hands on top of his shoulders, then gazed into the blue ocean of his eyes. "You were my first love." 


End file.
